Ten Things Not to Do in the Tropics

1. Put your hand in a tree without first looking to see if a viper has made a home there – there’s nothing like a poisonous snake bite to put a damper on a good time.

2. Take that cute lost little goat home with you – it belongs to someone and they will come and make a fuss about your bad manners.

3. Walk barefoot in the grass – all sorts of little poisonous critters make their homes there if they don’t live in the trees.

4. Turn your back on the surf to admire the sunset – the sea is a wild beast and loves to claim the naïve and unsuspecting.

5. Snorkel without a shirt – your back is not submerged and you’ll spend several sleepless nights wondering how you could have been so stupid.

6. Wander around semi-naked – people in the tropics tend to be quite conservative about dress codes and will consider you to be a rude and uncultured tourist.

7. Drive your motorbike in shorts, flip-flops and a sleeveless shirt – when you fall (and you will), you are going to lose a lot of skin.

8. Drink that clear, cool water in the stream right down the road – your tummy will find out what invisible critters live there.

9. Tell everyone you meet that you don’t believe in magic and people that do lack the benefits of a Western scientific education – you’ll be amazed at all the bad things that will happen to you in the next few days.

10. Spin tall tales about all the strange food that you’ve eaten – your hosts will expect you to love the duck eggs with the half-formed duckling still inside.

The Bonus 11th thing not to do –

11. Leave your hotel – you never know what’s lurking in the real world of the tropics.

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~ by drbrucepk on April 21, 2008.

2 Responses to “Ten Things Not to Do in the Tropics”

  1. keep you feet dry when you are in the forest.. Nice blog! 😀

  2. Thanks. Good idea about the feet, I never seem to be able to do it.

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